Xicor [Approved]

Xicor was very strong. He had big muscles. He was wearing red and black clothes. He was wearing saiyan boots. Xicor was home thinking about going to the arena. He decided to go. One guy asked him to spar. Xicor said:"OK, lets start". They both took their fighting stances and the bout began. The other man started with a punch in Xicors head. Xicor was flyng from the hard punch, but he regained control before he hit into anything. Xicor rushed into the enemy but the enemy saiyan dodged the attack. The saiyan threw ki blasts at Xicor, but only 2 of them hit him. Xicor fell to the ground. The saiyan approached him, but Xicor hit him in the stomach with his legs. The saiyan was flying from the hard hit. He hit the walls of the arena. Xicor jumped high and falling he hit the saiyan in his head. The saiyan was hurt very badly. The arena judge made Xicor the winner and the other saiyan was taken to the hospital. The new enemy approached. He said:"You're pretty strong and your last fight was good. Lets see what you're gonna do against me." They started the fight with a couple of punches. The saiyan throwed some ki blasts. Xicor dodged them all and ran to the saiyan. Xicor kicked the saiyan in his legs. The saiyan fell. Then he started rapidly punching him. The saiyan didn't die but was unconsciousness. Xicor won the fight, however, the judge said:"You have been disqualified from acting so violent." and the crowd started booing. Xicor said:"I don't see why i should be disqualified. Its his fault he didnt take care and acted so stupid to challenge me". Xicor then went home, thinking about what will happen tommorow.
Zeny: 150
PL: 40
STR 15
AGI 13
END 5
SPR 7

((Well I hope its good bcuz this looks like an awesome rpg and i wanna join it))

(( When talking in any chats out of character other than general I think you're supposed to use (( )) around everything that you say as to make a point of the fact that it's out of character I'm starting to feel like I talk too much on these boards but I suppose it goes along with being determined to make it a more sociable forum by the way sorry Korn for again chatting in New Vegeta but at least I'm being helpful and make sure I'm out of character when I do so! ))

((It's ok Valekn, I appreciate that your helping out here ^^
Xicor, make your roleplay a bit longer. Check out the other roleplays here if your out of ideas))

((I made it longer. Is it good now?))

((It looks more like a list of events then a story (..and then.. then..). It seems like there is no plot behind it and no reason for any of those actions. Why did they attack him? Where did it happened? How he got to the desert and what happened during those weeks? I hope you understand where im going with this.))

((I fixed it a little))

Approved!
((You barely made it Next time make sure to add more details and describe every thing the best way you can))